Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Wondering Where I Went?

Hey Gladney yahoo friends! Wondering where I went? Well, I was placed on moderation, without warning, over this post (which was deleted, so maybe you didn't get to see it.)

Apparently, discussing your dissatisfaction with someone's behavior is okay, as long as you are complaining that their behavior is offensive due to religious content. Complaining about someone's behavior is not okay if you are complaining that they are condescending and discriminating.

This is what the Moderator of the group considers "bashing." This is what I call expressing an opinion in an honest and respectful way- I also call this "calling it like I see it." Notice, I did not call names or use foul/inflammatory/offensive language. I just stated the ways in which I was dissatisfied.

This is why I can't be on the group anymore. It's why I went to the gladney_africa group. I can't handle someone who is so fundamentally flawed limiting my freedom of speech in whatever way fancies her. I hope all you Gladney families will join me on the gladney_africa group, where freedom of speech is a gift we freely enjoy.

15 comments:

DC said...

Wow! Whatever happened to free speech?? I think your post was well-reasoned and your tone remained calm throughout. I'm sorry this happened to you.

Anonymous said...

I have to say. I joined that group when it first opened. The first day a situation arose and I thought then, this isn't a place I want to be.(I had just left an adoption Taiwan board that was much like this) SO, I left it. I'm so glad the new board has opened up.

Jan

m&r said...

Ugh. Such a shame that a forum that could have been used to promote tolerance and understanding has turned so ugly. I am finding the back and forth over what is/is not acceptable and the tone of some of those emails more offensive than any of the emails that started the debate. (And I don't mean yours in particular - I actually thought your posts were very well stated).

I will see you on the Gladney-Africa forum!

~Laura~ said...

preach it sister! I appreciate your honesty and integrity. Thank you for being a voice for those that were to scared to say anything...there were a few of them...I assure you.

Unknown said...

Good job! It takes a lot of courage to stand up for what you believe in without being a jerk. You did great!

Unknown said...

Wow! I can't believe it's happened again! I had been on that forum for only about a week when there was an ugly discussion over an unfortunate term someone used. No mercy was shown and I was appalled that these were people adopting children! I had myself removed because Natanya refused to ask people to treat each other with respect.
Amy

Jennifer said...

Whew. Glad to be away from there. Hopefully we can keep a tolerant, open minded, supportive, kindred board over at Gladney_Africa. I just don't get the whole the thing... I think your email was right on.

Anonymous said...

Yuck. I hate behaviour like that. It's why I no longer read the "big" yahoo group (EthioAdopt) - too many creepy intolerant ranters.

Sorry you got dinged. Sounds like you are better off somewhere else.

Lori said...

As I wrote you already: kudos. You rock.

Jana said...

hmmmm. i think your post is reasonble and well-written. no, one isn't allowed to "bash," but surely one is allowed to have an opinion without being shut down.

mama becca said...

I couldn't believe what I was reading half the time... I haven't posted on that board for a looong time. I think a commenter above mentioned one incident where NO mercy was shown to someone who unintentionally used a phrase that was offensive. Everyone was so, so mean to her. I tried to ask everyone to be respectful and was met with silence. I get so sad when people are mean and rude to each other. You were spot-on... you stood up for yourself and you were respectful. I'm sorry that some people can't put their big-girl pants on and act like adults. I, too, am worried that they will be parenting! yikes! here comes another generation of bullies! Good job, Grace. Thanks for sticking up for many of us.
becca

Mrs. Kensington said...

I only lasted about a week until I was flame-sprayed off.

amy-o said...

Thanks Grace! I was able to read your Yahoo post as part of my daily digest and thought it was well thought-out and considerate! I joined the gladney_ethiopia group about a month ago..I can't believe how this recent topic was handled...It does not make any sense to me how human nature can act this way! I couldn't believe it when I hear the terms "religious speak", "bigoted language" and "profanity" all in the same sentence...As if they are equally offensive! I joined the gladney_africa group yesterday and look foward to the discussions. P.S. I have followed your blog for awhile (found it on the Gladney site) and have always enjoyed reading it..(Sorry for being a lurker!)

Amy
www.withajoyfulheart.com

Jana said...

Happy about the new group. Concerned that people keep gossiping about the old one. (NOT so much like Jesus.)

I don't mean you, Grace. :)

VALARIE said...

Grace, over these long months that we've waited together I have always found you to be so thoughtful in the way that you approach situations. And, here you are again. I'm sure that the Gladney families are happy to have you among them.