Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Week 23


Someone once suggested that I not count the weeks of waiting that have occurred during the present delays. I thought about that for a while, and then decided that delays of all kinds are a part of the process of international adoption. Just because the cause of the delay has nothing to do with me, Sparrow, or my agency does not mean that the delay "shouldn't count." So I will continue to count these weeks. They are are part of the longing for my daughter that I want to chronicle. And they are a part of the preparation that the Lord is doing in my heart.

On Monday we had a conference call with Gladney and the Ethiopian process families. I learned a lot, and yes, most of my 17 questions were addressed (some of the items brought up by the Gladney staff were worded almost exactly as my question was phrased:) A reader asked what my "gut feeling" is.

Honestly, I wish I had a gut feeling. But the call left me realizing that there are still so many unknowns. That is part and parcel in the world of international adoption. I can either accept it, or not accept it, but I probably can't change it.

So, I accept it. I am working on redefining my expectations, which has been difficult. I now hope to have my little Sparrow home before Abigail's birthday (falls at Thanksgiving time) or Christmas at the latest. I know it may be sooner than that, and I am working on accepting that it may be later than that. And I am back to working on my list of benefits of post-court-closure travel. (Feel free to add to the list!)

Abigail asked when her sister would be home. For the first time, instead of answering "soon!" or "maybe at the end of the summer!" I told her that I honestly don't know.

"But you know who does know?" I asked her.

"Who?"

"God knows." And that was a big encouragement to both of us.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sounds like you are in a good place.
I think your wise to adjust your expectations.
For what its worth. We had accepted our referral last spring and due to some paper issues our case was filed just BEFORE last year's court closure with the knowledge that we wouldn't have a court date (usually your court date is 3-4 weeks after filing the court papers). We were first up on the docket after the courts reopened in the Fall, got postponed 3 times, passed and traveled less than one month later..Nov. 17th...
I pray the log jam is broken soon.
carol

Emy said...

Yeah, that was me that suggested not counting this time. What was I thinking??? You ARE still waiting, how could it not count? I just didn't want that ticker to run out!!! :)

I saw a couple of families on the FBI had new court dates. Does that mean that things are moving in the right direction???

JK x2 said...

I'm sure I've shared this before, but that was the hardest part of the waiting for the girls. Not being able to think of any good reason why they wouldn't be home by Christmas...their 1st birthday...the wedding...our July visit...it kept going.
I found myself saying "just forget it, I'm not setting dates anymore" Then I would wonder if I was being realistic or lacking faith...it's a tough line sometimes. But always come back to "God's timing is perfect; God's plans are best." over and over and over!

haze said...

"God knows." Perfect.