Camp

Is anyone thinking of going to Ethiopian heritage and culture camp? Has anyone been there?

We are out for BU '09 as my request for time off was denied (boo!)*

But we do want to connect with some more Ethio families, and I just wanted some feedback from anyone who will or has attended.


*We will be in Chicago the last weekend in June- the 25th to the 30th-ish if anyone wants to play! Email or FB me! yellow_grace at yahoo dot com

Because I am a mother.

Some of you may know coffeemom. She is a woman who inspires me to have a deeper faith in- a deeper appreciation of- a deeper love for God and those around me. She has been an encouragement to me, probably more often than she knows because I don't always take the time to tell her that. While I have never met her in "real life," in many ways, I aspire to be like her. She is sincere, humble, passionate, broken, and desperately seeking the One who makes all things right.

She is longing for her daughter right now.

Bureaucracy is probably the hardest part of adoption- especially international adoption. And right now, Michele, Tom, their children already home, and their daughter who awaits them in Ethiopia are victims of bureaucracy. They are stuck in a series of "pass the buck" communications within the US government. They want their daughter home. And they are being told that she cannot come home, because of policies and procedures that aren't even yet established. You can read more about their struggle here.

I am one fairly insignificant person. I am not rich, famous, or politically powerful. I don't know any people who are; I have no idea what I can do to help bring Marta home. But I do know the One who holds this whole situation in his hands, the One who cares more about the hearts of Michele, Tom, and Marta than anyone could imagine. I know the One who designed us to be in families- the one who places the orphan into a family, the One who adopted us into His family. And I know that He is working out this whole scenario to bring Him glory.

Our finite minds may not understand this- the suffering that this family is going through- the pain of separation of parents and child, the fears that Marta has, the un-quenched longings. We cannot understand how this can be part of God's plan, and yet we know that He will work out all things for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. That is what He promises to do.

So let's call out to the One- the grand designer of this family, this unique process of coming to be a family through adoption. While our hands are tied and our voices weak, let's bring our hearts to the One whose strength is immeasurable and whose word is Truth. Instead of sitting and listening to people who make empty promises- or no promises at all, let's run to the One who is the fulfillment of every promise of love and eternal life.

Will you join me and many others around this world in praying for Michele, Tom, and Marta on Tuesday, May 12 from 8-8:30pm EST? Of course, you can feel free to pray whenever you wish as well- and certainly, if you know someone or have any connection, I know Michele and her family would appreciate you advocating for them. But if you are like me, just one fairly insignificant person without any way of helping, will you please give your time and commit to praying for this family? Prayer works.

"Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need."

Hebrews 4:16

Prayers for Travis

As most Gladney Ethiopia Program families know, Travis Norwood, one of the in-country reps for Gladney, has been having some serious battles with his health. I thank God for the opportunity he had to be in the US and get the great care that the US health care system offers.

Please keep the Norwood family in your prayers during his continued therapy and recovery time. Please also pray for the rest of the staff in Ethiopia who are carrying the weight of the Norwood's work while they are here in the US.

If you would like to participate in a group prayer time, on Sunday, November 16 from 7:30-8:00pm EST, join with others across the nation as we pray for Travis, his family, the doctors treating him, the in country staff who know him so well and are acting in his absence in Ethiopia and all of those who have been or who are touched by Travis's presence in their lives...

Our children and each of us are better for having him work with Gladney.

BU '09 (Chicago!)

So, BU '09 is in Chicago this year! Woot! I love my hometown! (let me rephrase that- I love to visit my hometown!) August 6-9, 2009. We will so be there- as might the infamous Doctor John, my mom, and my sister! Hope to see all the Ethiopian adoptive families there!

Click here to check out
The Ethiopian Blog Union!

300

It's NOT...

The Chrysler 300.

It's NOT...

The movie 300.



It IS...


Post number 300!

That's right, folks! This is my 300th post on this blog! Can you believe it? Neither can I:) I always knew I liked to talk a lot- I didn't know I liked to talk this much!

In honor of my 300th post, I would like to do 2 special things.

First, I would like to get 100 comments. Seem impossible? It's not. (You are allowed multiple comments:) Talk about your adoption journey. Tell me something really great that has happened to you today. De-lurk and just introduce yourself with a little howdy! I read every comment, and there is nothing I like more than knowing I made someone think, encouraged them a bit, or just made them smile. (And come on, ladies, which of you didn't smile when you saw the abs in that 300 picture up there? Nice:)

Second, I would like to do something about the present crisis in Ethiopia. People are starving. Children are starving. Babies, too feble to cry, are lying listlessly in their mother's laps, unable to find the energy to even open their eyes.

I feel horrible about this, but so often, I feel like there is nothing I can do. My budget is tight right now, saving for the adoption, and what could my few dollars do?

I think a lot of us feel that way. Maybe you can only give a dollar or two. So you just don't give. But I think that if we pooled all of our dollars together, we could easily gather $300 to donate to humanitarian relief. That is my goal: $300 dollars to feed the children of Ethiopia, raised out of the kindness of my readers' hearts. Will you help me?

The money raised from donations will be sent to WorldVision. I chose World Vision because they are the World Food Program's largest distributor and have the infrastructure already in place to provide food to the hungry as quickly as possible. They have agreed to InterAction's standards, and 86% of our contribution will go directly to food aid. They are also a Christian organization that shares my values. They also offer child sponsorship, and in addition to emergency food aid, they are working in Ethiopia to promote a better future for children and their families.

Readers, you are the best, and you are a huge part of what drives me to continue blogging. I know that together we can do something to help these starving children. Please celebrate this blog, this 300th post, by donating.

The Hague List

You probably remember me talking about the Hague convention here and here. The US Department of State has just updated it's list of "Approved" and "Temporarily Accredited" adoption service providers.



Choosing an agency that was Hague compliant and Hague approved was important to me, and is something that is and will continue to be very important in my international adoption journey. If you are considering IA, you need to check out this list.

Wrapping Up Black History Month

Below is the article "Bond Between Ethiopian, African Americans Examined." It gives an interesting viewpoint of the historical context of the relationship between Ethiopians and African Americans. Very informative.


On Monday night, a bus full of New York Abyssinian Baptist Church members drove to Washington, D.C. to join the Ethiopian community to honor the church and its pastor, the Rev. Dr. Calvin Butts III.

The event, which was hosted at the Ethiopian embassy, was also intended to celebrate Black History Month and to strengthen the historical and spiritual connections between the Ethiopian and African-American communities.

“During slavery, African Americans always looked at Ethiopia as a place that represented freedom, black culture, history and religion,” said Princeton University professor Ephraim Isaac, who spoke at the event. “It inspired the fight against discrimination and religion. When slaves were told they were inferior, they were animals or subhuman, they would think of Ethiopia.”
Isaacs, who is also the founder of the African-American studies department at Harvard, quoted Langston Hughes’ poem, “The Call of Ethiopia.” The poem addressed the freedom of not only Ethiopia, but also the entire African continent.

Sociology professor Alem Habtu of CUNY Queens College described how, as an international student from Ethiopia, he learned from African Americans during the civil rights movement.
Habtu, along with some peers, took over the Ethiopian embassy in protest of issues concerning their country after hearing Stokely Carmichael and members of the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee (SNCC) speak.

The guests included members of the Congressional Black Caucus (CBC), and the ambassador of Ethiopia, Samuel Assefa.

Robert Wallace, CEO of Birthgroup Technologies, said he plans to build orphanages for children whose parents died of AIDS/HIV.

Gary Flowers, executive director and CEO of the Black Leadership Forum, addressed the need to get back to the root of black culture.

“I am, because we are; and because we are, I am,” Flowers said. “There is no individual advancement without group advancement.”

The director of communications for Ambassador Al Rutherford said the program is the first of many that will recognize the connection between the two cultures.

The evening ended with the honoring of Butts, as he was presented with a piece of artwork by a famous Ethiopian painter.

His long-term goal is to use the church’s developmental corporation to build housing and educational facilities in Ethiopia.

“We can not be chauvinistic about our connection to Ethiopia and cannot deny what needs to happen,” said Butts.

Conflict

I am borrowing this info from Habesha Child.

Ethiopia seems to be surrounded by conflict and the latest violence in Kenya is just one more to add to the list, I’m sorry to say.
If you think about Ethiopia’s neighbors, it starts to sound pretty scary:

On Ethiopia’s Eastern border lies Somalia - tons of violence and conflict there.

Depending on your politics, you could count the next bordering country as self-declared state of Somaliland. Again - high conflict, high violence.

Just north of Somalia / Somaliland on Ethiopia’s border is the tiny nation of Djibouti - probably the only stable place around right now. Thank God, because it’s Ethiopia’s primary access to a seaport at this point (Kenya’s Mombassa is an alternative, but Eritrea does not allow Ethiopia to use its ports).

Continuing counterclockwise, the next country is Eritrea, to Ethiopia’s North - bad news here. Ethiopia and Eritrea have increasingly hostile relations, and are on the brink of another war over the long-contested border between them.

To the West, we find Sudan. The site of perhaps the worst genocidal violence in the world right now. ‘nuf said.

Finally, to the South, Kenya. (Lots of tribal violence at this time.)


While I am not particularly concerned about our safety while in Ethiopia, I will ask you to pray for safety for us in our travels to and from Ethiopia, and while we are there. Addis Ababa recently hosted the African Union summit, and is considered a safe and stable place. But anything can change.

So pray for us. But more importantly, please pray for my Ethiopian daughter, as she waits for her Momma in a land surrounded by conflict. And pray for the children of these nations whose lives are being cut short by grown-ups who can't find a way to peacefully resolve thier conflicts.

So you see? The whole thing in Kenya conflict starts to sound pretty tame, although I’m sure that’s not the case for people there.

When There's No Place Like Home

Brianna recently wrote a series of 2 posts in reaction to this Newsweek article. The article discusses the role that UNICEF is taking in discouraging intercountry adoptions by taking the viewpoint that it is best for kids to stay within their own country and culture when being adopted.

Of course, as I learn more and more about adoption, I cannot help but agree that kids should, when possible, remain within their own country/culture. Brianna does a good job articulating a "good, better, best" senario ("best" being that kids are able to remain with their own parents or within their own family.)

However, it is simply unrealistic to think that the 6 million orphans in Ethiopia would ever be able to be adopted within their own country. There are just too many kids, and not enough resources. Again, I would refer you to Brianna's post- she does a great job explaining why intercountry adoption is still a good option, even though it's not the "better" or "best" option.

This is something that I see presented as a concern of most adoptive parents, and it is closely tied to ethical adoptions. I encourage you to read the article, read Brianna's reaction, and tell me what YOUR thoughts are. I am still sorting mine out. Like most adoption topics, heck, most parenting topics, I don't know if there is black and white on this issue. I see a lot of gray.

Getting My Gall Up

In my previous post, I linked to a beautiful picture of the Omo Valley in Ethiopia. The picture is found on a site called EthioPolitics. I follow this site because it's important for me to learn about my child's homeland, and just like politics directly affect my bio daughter in America (ie- "No Child Left Behind"), the are affecting my adopted daughter in Ethiopia.

Readers of this blog will know that from time to time, I will link to interesting news stories about Ethiopia. I do this because the purpose of this blog is to inform my readers about my journey- not just the "emotional" journey, not just the papers and waits, but the journey I am taking to learn about my daughter's heritage and culture. I am excited about the things I learn because I am falling in love with the people of Ethiopia, and the more I learn about them, the more I love them. And ultimately, isn't this blog about sharing love?

I received a comment on my previous post that stated "Talk about adoption, not politics. Thank you." This comment was anonymous. This comment really got my gall up.

Why? Several reasons.

1) The politics of Ethiopia are directly affecting my daughter. They are a part of my adoption journey. They may play an even bigger role in my journey based on how the political situation in Ethiopia swings over the next several months. The relationships between governments, the wars, the economic situation of the country- all affect my daughter! It would be unwise to not be aware of this.

2) This is my blog. I can write about whatever I want. Just because this blog is intended primarily as a way to talk about my adoption journey, there is no limit on the content except my own imagination. I think it is ridiculous that someone out there is trying to censor me.

3) The original post wasn't even about politics. It was on a political site, but I merely linked to the picture. I was not trying to force political views on anyone. In fact, I keep my views of politics, both US and Ethiopian, fairly private considering I am a person who has 2 blogs.

4) Because the post is anonymous, there is no way to open a discussion. An anonymous comment is rarely intended to open discussion, it is rather a command- a statement that the poster does not want questioned. In general, that annoys me because my blog is intended to be interactive- a dialogue that helps both myself and my readers learn and grow.

So, commenter, I invite you to open a discussion. Why did you feel the original post was about politics? Why do you feel that this blog should be limited to "adoption, not politics"? How should the political climate in Ethiopia (that is very much affecting my daughter) be considered/shared if not on my blog? Why should my blog not contain my concerns, fears, opinions, and thoughts about any subject I wish to discuss?

For the rest of you, what are your thoughts?

Roots

It is my hope that my Ethiopian daughter will not loose touch with her wonderful heritage as an Ethiopian. The reality is, though, that growing up as an American will change her. This will be both good and bad. But through service, travel, (and maybe even future adoptions), I hope both of my daughters can learn about Ethiopia and make it a part of their lives.

Here is a beautiful article from Parade about one adopted Ethiopian-American girl's return to her native land.

African? American? Ethiopian?

"My daughters have caramel brown skin, dark brown eyes, and tightly curled black hair. They are African by birth, American by citizenship, but have always self-identified as Habesha (the Amharic word for Ethiopian)."

This was a great article written about parenting adopted Ethiopian children. Check it out!

Do you Hague?

Ever wondered what all the fuss about the Hague Treaty is? You have probably heard me talk about it here. Below is a good article from the NY Times:

"The United States, the world leader in international adoptions, will join more than 70 nations committed to standardizing policies, procedures and safeguards to reduce corruption in the largely unregulated adoption marketplace."

I really believe that transparency and accountability in adoption is so very important to promoting ethical adoption practices. Even though enacting the Hague Treaty (and working with an agency that requires me to act as if the Hague Treaty is in full effect) can be a hassle (and expensive!) I really do believe that it is necessary.

"The Most Pointless War"

Here is an interesting article from Newsweek about the rising tensions in Ethiopia and Eritrea.

In other news, the first multi-screen movie theater has opened in the capitol of Ethiopia, Addis Ababa.

And I like Starbuck coffee.

Snag

I knew there would be a few snags along the way. And on Wednesday I hit my first one.

Because of the differences in requirements from my home study agency and my placing agency, my home study social worker did not have the necessary number of personal references to complete my home study. Additionally, because of the holiday, my placing agency was not available to review my home study. So, two minor snags resulting in a short delay in my home study.

But it all worked out:) I called the director of Abigail's day care/school, and she whipped up a quick reference letter by Wednesday afternoon. And yesterday I received another reference letter in the mail, so now I have more than enough references for both my HS agency and my placing agency. Hopefully I will have a notarized copy of my HS by the end of the week since I plan on taking everything to Harrisburg to get it authenticated on Thursday.

Then, a copy of the HS to USCIS, and soon an I171H!

Done Like a Turkey on Thanksgiving Day!

Yes, folks, my home study is done! I should have it before Thanksgiving, too!

It was really NOT a big deal, and I am glad I did not go overboard with the cleaning. We sat at my dining room table and went over a bunch of paperwork and questions. Then a quick tour of the house.

Abigail was her usual great self, and the HS lady was very impressed by her. And of course she was looking adorable. I do think Megan was a little taken aback by the streamers and cupcakes, but I explained that they were for the party, and then she got excited:)

(I will post pics of the party on my other blog.)

So, that's it- the last "big" thing on my end. Now I just sit back and wait for my I171H.

Questioning

I'm surprised by how many people immediately link me to Angelina Jolie when I mention that I am in the process of adopting from Ethiopia. It doesn't offend me or anything, especially since I think that is really the only frame of reference most people have for international adoption, specifically from Ethiopia. It does kind of annoy me though, because AJ and I are, of course, very different people, and I don't think it is fair to extend her reasons and motivations for adopting to me, or mine to her. Oh well, it is what it is.

Recently, allegations were made in Ethiopia from the birth family of AJ's adopted Ethiopia daughter, Zahara. Basically, a woman claimed to be Zahara's birth mother and stated that she never legally relinquished the baby. Zahara was relinquished in 2005 by her grandmother who testified in court and presented 3 witnesses who claimed the birth mother was dead and the biological father was unknown. AJ adopted the baby when she was 7 months old. The Wide Horizon's adoption agency, a well-known and established agency in Ethiopia, has backed AJ and states that the adoption was perfectly legal in all respects according to Reuters. They report that someone had paid the Ethiopian people to make the complaints.

This really irked me. What this comes down to is a child. People out there, for reasons unknown, are willing to rip apart the life of this little child- they give no thought to her. I don't personally know AJ or Zahara, but it seems evident that they love and care about each other and their whole family. And someone was willing to tear that child out of the family and home that she knows just to make some trouble or get their 15 minutes of fame? Why?

Why is our society so willing to punish children like that?

80% live on < $2/day

Here is a report that appeared in the Economist about the current economic situation in Ethiopia. Pretty shocking stuff.

War, Peace, and a Very Fine Line

For those who may not be aware of the political situation in Ethiopia, here is a Newsweek article that describes the impending war the country could be facing.

FAQ

Q: Will she have AIDS?

A: I was quite surprised when I learned that many people were concerned that the new little one would have HIV/AIDS. While this is a horrible disease, and occurs frequently throughout Africa, not all orphaned children are HIV+.

Just to remind you, it is actually fairly difficult to pass HIV. The virus is very unstable and does not "live" on environmental surfaces. In fact, blood-to-blood contact is one of the few ways HIV is spread (transfusion, sharing needles.) Other ways include penile-vaginal, penile-oral, or penile-rectal contact without a condom, childbirth (not during pregnancy- the virus does not cross the placenta), and breastfeeding. You cannot get HIV from sharing a bathroom, sharing linens, eating off the same dishes, kissing or changing diapers of those infected with HIV. In fact, people without HIV are more likely to infect people with HIV with colds, flu, and other infections than those with HIV are to infect others with HIV.

That being said, all children coming into orphanages are give a "rapid" HIV test and a PCR (more accurate) test upon admission to the orphanage. For those children who are relinquished (given up by parents) a parental history is obtained if possible. (Obviously, abandoned children are not able to have a parental history.) When filling out the Gladney application, I was given the option of having a second HIV PCR test performed before accepting the referral. All children are given another "rapid" test before being issued a passport.

I have chosen to have the second PCR test performed prior to accepting a referral. This is NOT because I am opposed to caring for a child with HIV or out of fear for myself or Abigail, but rather out of the fact that people who "die from AIDS" actually die from other diseases and infections that take over the person's body. I don't think, being a single mom, that I could devote the time and resources necessary to care for an HIV+ child. I am very thankful for those who do choose to adopt HIV+ children. Many of these children do quite well once they get the anti-retro viral (ARV) drugs that we have here in the US. In fact, many of these children do so well and have such a positive response from their white blood cells that they never progress to AIDS. (The distinction between HIV and AIDS is based on the number of certain types of white blood cells present.) Many of the HIV+ women who take these drugs can give birth to an HIV- child. Unfortunately, these drugs are not available in Africa (at least, not to the masses) due to the high costs.